I’m going to give you three tips to get more happiness in your life. Now.
Tip #1: Happiness vs. Success
The first tip is to make sure you understand the difference between the word “happy” and the word “successful”. A lot of people get these two things mixed up, and I do not want you to do the same thing. Success is getting what you want. If you set out to achieve something and you achieve that thing, then you were successful, but you may not be happy. There are so many people that have gotten to the top of the ladder that they were trying to climb only to realize, “Oh my God, it’s leaning against the wrong building.”
Happiness is wanting what you get along the way, regardless of whether it is successful or not, pleasurable or not, or if you have to wait a little tiny bit. Let’s say, for example, I drink a beer. Is the beer going to make me happy? No, but if I put the beer down and go work really hard at something, and along the way, I start to get these little, small wins. Well, I delayed the gratification and I am actually happier than if I just drank the beer. So don’t chase happiness. Don’t chase success. Chase excellence, chase life, chase getting to the best version of you that you possibly can. And along the way, the growth is the happiness.
Tip #2: Choose Your Tribe Wisely
Tip number two is to be careful of who you spend your time with. You are the average of the five people you spend the most amount of time with. If you have five close friends that you spend a lot of time with every single week, and four of them are constantly complaining, victim blaming, and spreading negativity, then I want you to consider, “Why am I spending more time with people that make me a worse version of myself, rather than people that could support me along the way getting to what I want?” You should have friends that help you almost more than you help yourself. That is what family, friends, and your spouse should be for, so you be careful about who you choose to surround yourself with.
Tip #3: Reprogram Your Thoughts
Tip number three piggybacks off of the second tip. I want you to pay attention to the thoughts and the feelings that you have over the course of the next couple days. Why? Well, if you are the average of the five closest friends you have, you are also the average of their thoughts and emotions. If what you are thinking and feeling is negative stuff yourself, then your friends may want to cut you out of their lives, too. So it is important to actively reprogram your thoughts, key word, “actively”. You have to be aware of what is going on, whether this is on the notepad on your phone, or a physical notepad you carry around so that every time you have a negative thought, you can write it down and underneath it. I want you to write down a thought or emotion that you want to think or feel in place of it, and then practice. You’ve got to practice feeling better, otherwise the old negative programming is just going to keep going.
Bonus tip: Strive for growth
Last bonus tip is when you are implementing any of these tips, I seriously encourage you to have a smile on your face the whole time. Why? Guess what, you are growing. You are going to get better than you currently are and that is the entire purpose of life. If you ever feel like you are starting to get really happy, I actually want you to pause and look at your life and say, “Hey, where can I still grow as a person?” Because if you are not growing, then you are dying just like a fallen tree that fell over because its root structure gave up. That does not have to be you, so keep a smile on your face. Don’t just chase happiness or success, look at your five closest friends, and be a little more intentional about your thoughts.
I hope this was very helpful to you all and as always, have a happy, healthy rest your day. Talk to you in the next one.